Tag: D

Baby girl D

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Are you there God? It’s me, SM

A few weeks ago I stumbled across a post on the blog Not-Calm, and after I read this paragraph from it I felt like my head had been struck by lightning. Or 1,000 light bulbs had gone off inside it. Or something along those lines. (emphasis added by me)

When Lex was in kindergarten and went through a time where he couldn’t sleep at night because the idea of dying was upsetting him too much, I told him that before he was born his whole world was inside of me.  He could hear my voice, in an underwater, warped way, and he maybe knew that he wasn’t alone, that there was something else keeping him company.  And, I told him, it would have been impossible for him to imagine the world that he was about to be born into.  Light, colors, air, trees, smells, cars, houses, seashells, rockets, food, even his mother – everything he could think of – all of it was so close to him all the time but he had no way to know.  I told him that we have no idea what happens after we die, but that if we have the sense that there’s more out there, then I think it’s because there is.  That there’s something holding us that we can’t see or imagine, but we can still feel is there. It seemed to help him.  I know it helped me.

That part in bold is basically the exact view I hold of religion, yet have been unable to put it into words. Thank you, Jenijen, for doing it for me. Now that we have a daughter and will hopefully give her a sibling or two someday, the concept of religion and my feelings toward it has been in my thoughts a lot more often than it used to be.

I do believe in God, or a god of some sort, but my religion basically stops there. Which may seem pretty odd, considering I grew up going to Sunday School and church pretty much every week, was baptized as a baby, and went through Confirmation in my church. I was raised Presbyterian, and R and I were even married in a Presbyterian church. It was a very non-denominational church, but a Presbyterian one nonetheless.

I have never denounced organized religion or anything like that, nor have I ever had a bad experience with the church either. I guess I basically just got bored with it, and never saw the point of having a book that was written thousands of years ago govern my way of thinking and living. Although we attended church regularly, my family was not overly religious when I was younger, so it’s just not something that was deeply ingrained in me with much importance. And quite frankly, the highlight of the sermon for me each week was counting the pipes in our church’s organ. There are 152. That is a number I don’t think I will ever forget.

So when we decided to have kids, I knew I probably wasn’t going to feel the need to raise them with a strong emphasis on religion either. I felt I may get a little pressure on this from R’s family though, who are pretty devout Catholics.

And for some reason, and this will probably totally expose my religious ignorance, Catholicism has always seemed to me to be a religion that wants to push you until you join them and follow their rules. And man do they have a lot of rules, something I’ve discovered in the 11 years R and I have been together. He’s not even a strict Catholic anymore either, more along the lines of barely even practicing. He’s given up on the no meat during Lent thing, and neither of us has been to church in years. And no, he has not forsaken his religion either, it’s just not something that is high on either of our lists.

Some people may be gasping in horror at this lack of faith in our lives, but it just is what it is. It’s not even a complete lack of faith really, but maybe a lack of practicing that faith actively anymore. And personally, I don’t see this as having had a negative impact on our lives at all.

But back to the having kids without really having religion. What then? From the start I just assumed we would not have our children baptized as infants, but let that be a choice for them to make on their own when they’re old enough to make it.

Seems fair, right? I mean, why force a religion label on a baby who has no idea what any of it means, and whose parents are not only 2 different religions but don’t really practice either of them anyway? Which one would we choose, and why?

I know scads of people will disagree with me on this, but I kind of find the notion that God will shun any life simply because it has not been baptized ridiculous. Many people hold the baptismal rite as something profoundly sacred, and I fully respect that. It’s just not for me. I think if, god-forbid, D passed away before she was baptized, she would not spend eternity rotting in hell simply due to that fact. It just doesn’t jive for me. I think if there is a heaven, her spot has been reserved for almost a year now, no matter what happens from here on out.

There are so many different religions out there, 99% of which I know extremely little about, it just makes sense to me to allow our kids to discover them, learn about them, and see if there’s one that they really feel drawn to. Just as long as it’s not some crazy unibomber kool-aid-drinking cult, I’ll be satisfied. And who knows, maybe someday I’ll feel the need and/or desire to go back to church, and then maybe I’ll even see if D wants to be baptized into it, but right now I’m happy how we are.

Here’s kind of how I see things. Like I said, I do believe in a god figure of some sort. Is it the exact God I learned about in the Bible, the one who we all grew up picturing as a grandfatherly man with an enormously long gray beard dressed in enormously long flowing white robes who lives up in the clouds? Eh, maybe not. But I definitely think there’s something out there.

I do believe in evolution, and the Big Bang theory makes much more sense to me than the story of Creation (a person from a rib? does not compute), but something had to have caused that spark that ignited the Big Bang. Something had to make that second in time happen so that the entire universe could then spill forth.

That something is kind of more how I picture god. And I think I’m more comfortable with it being a lower case g god, too. I’m not convinced it’s a human figure, but more of a spirit. Like those words above say, it’s that sense we have that there’s more out there, because I totally have that sense.

And you may find this part really weird, but yes, I do say bedtime prayers. In fact, I say the exact same “Now I lay me down to sleep…” version that I made up with my mom when I was little that includes all of my family members, pets, and my youngest sister at the end since she came along after I already had the list solidified. I have come to add my own touches here and there too as I feel the need, especially now that I have my own little family. D always gets a shout-out for protection, and R makes the list too on those days when he’s being nice to me.

But what about Baby Jesus? I don’t know, what about him? Did he exist? I don’t know. Why do we celebrate Christmas as his birth then? Good question. Don’t ask me, I didn’t devise the religious calendar for that part of the world’s population who believes in it.

See here’s the other thing. I don’t know why, but for as long as I can remember I have always gotten the weirdest feeling about the Bible. Like, how do we know it was really written by the people by whom you believe it was written? I know there are the Dead Sea Scrolls and all, but still. And how did its words come to stand as the law of the land? Um, that’s why it’s called faith, SM. Yes, I get that, and I guess that’s just where mine differs from many others’. I place my faith in the something more out there instead of those ancient pages.

This kind of turned into a jumbled vomit session. Sorry about that. Point is, though, that no, we’re not baptizing D. At least not anytime in the foreseeable future. And fortunately we never did get the push-back I was expecting about that either. R’s mom did ask him a few months ago if we were going to, he said no, we hadn’t planned on it, and that was pretty much that.

And as for my religion/faith, I think it’s better described as a spirituality that I have, and I have finally found the right words with which to express it. It’s not a rock-solid foundation that I turn to in times of need or weakness like many people have in their own spirituality, but it’s the sense that there’s something bigger than all of us out there keeping tabs on everything and maybe giving a little nudge here and there so things don’t get utterly cosmically out of whack.

I have no idea what happens at the end of it all, but it will work itself out when the time comes. And to me, that strange little notion is kind of comforting.

 

 

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A light shade of green

Before I get started here, I just have to whine again for a minute. You’re probably sick of hearing about D’s nighttime crap by now, but too bad. It’s my blog and I can cry if I want to.

So last night she fell asleep on R when I was at the gym and he was actually able to put her down after that fairly easily. A little pulling her legs out straight so she wasn’t in a ball and keeping a hand on her back for a minute were involved, but point is she didn’t wake back up. Cool, good start.

Ehh – WRONG!

At 1:30 the sirens sounded from her room. I rocked her for a few minutes and thought she was asleep, but of course she popped right back up when I tried to put her down. Then I realized she had a diaper full of poop. Oops, no wonder. Tried the rocking again. Nope, I don’t want to sleep, Mom. Duh, it’s 2am, don’t you want to play too? NO, I DON’T. So I had to sleep with her on the couch again for the remainder of the night.

Now here’s the thing. I don’t think it’s an illness this time, although she has been pulling her ears again sometimes. I think it’s teeth, and more specifically, molars. Did anyone else’s kids have molars come in around the 1 year mark? Would these be some symptoms – teeth grinding, messing with her face/ears, fingers and hands in her mouth, overall general crankiness?

I haven’t seen or felt any in there yet, but my hunch is those suckers are lingering just under the surface right now, causing her these fits. And how long did they take to cut through? I don’t like this little turd that’s taken over my daughter.

But back to my point. Check out this post from Endurance Corner. It’s written by Gordo Byrn, the husband of a girl I swam with at Madison, and they are both absolutely ridiculous triathletes. Check out some of his accomplishments:

  • World Champion Ultra Distance (2002)
  • Multiple podium finishes at international races (2003/2004/2005/2006)
  • Swim, bike, run across America (2004) and New Zealand (2010)
  • Personal best of 8:29 at Ironman Canada (0:51 Swim, 4:48 Bike, 2:46 Run — 2004)
  • Co-Author Going Long (over 50,000 copies sold)

I mean really? Sick. In a good way sick, not like uh-oh I’m gonna barf sick. He also coaches for this stuff, which I think is the main purpose for that website. In all honesty I haven’t dug through the whole thing, I was just amazed by that post about Monica, his wife.

I remember seeing a picture of her from her first pregnancy that was taken at I think 39 weeks, and she looked like I did at about week 30, tops. Minus the butt, of course.

And I am not even exaggerating. I thought is this for real? She actually gave birth like one week later? Her stomach was TINY. And? And she left the hospital in her pre-pregnancy jeans. Um, you’re only in the hospital for like 2 days after delivery, assuming no complications. That article above says she was back down to her pre-pregnancy weight this time around by 2 weeks postpartum, too. Hmpf, bitch.

But seriously, I am just in awe. She is obviously an elite athlete, whereas I am nowhere close, but reading about her exercise regimen during her pregnancy made me feel like a total sloth. I know I did a very poor job of maintaining my workouts when I was pregnant with D, and that is the main thing I want to improve next time. Even if I get sick and feel crappy again, I want to try to at least do something on as many days as possible. Like Gordo says, “Do something every single day, even if it’s a walk or easy float in the pool.”

Now, every single day may be pushing it. Ok, that’s definitely pushing it and is unrealistic for me personally, especially since I have cut swimming from my agenda pretty much permanently for a while. But almost every day, that is a goal I would like to set.

The picture in that article was taken again at the very end of her pregnancy, and besides the amazing body and complete lack of belly that I was carrying around at the end, all I could think was holy boobs! Check those puppies out! So yeah, there are a couple things in there of which I was jealous.

 

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Army crawl

That’s what I was almost forced to use as my exit strategy from D’s room tonight after I put her to bed. Seriously, what is going on with this kid? Bedtime is turning into wartime again, and I am not amused.

She has to fall asleep taking a bottle, and if she rolls over and wakes up when you put her in her crib, forget it. You’ll have to start all over because she’ll stand up and start crying. Tonight it took no fewer than 5 tries to finally get her to sleep. And on that last time I held my hand on her stomach so she couldn’t roll over when I laid her down, or else I might still be in there, on round 476.

Why has this happened? She used to be fine going to bed – when she was nursing we could even put her down with no issue if she was still awake after her last feeding. She would put herself to sleep no problem. I want that D back. This one isn’t as nice.

I want to just let her cry it out, but R usually can’t take it as long as I can and goes in to rescue her. The other night he even said, “Oh, we’ll just spoil her until her birthday.” Meaning we’ll keep going back in to get her and continue giving her a bottle to go to sleep if she starts crying at bedtime until she turns 1 in a few weeks. Ugh. I don’t think that’s called “spoiling” her, I think that’s just teaching her a bad nighttime habit.

And no way could I try letting her cry tonight because R’s still sick and had gone into the bedroom about 3 hours before I was playing bedtime ranger. His Highness with the Sickness would not have been pleased. I was already chastised earlier today for making too much noise as I was responding to D’s little squeals and noises with my own.

As if.

I don’t know how much more of that I can take either. His doctor did put him on antibiotics yesterday for rheumatic fever (eh??) and strep throat (although his throat doesn’t hurt), but then he started feeling worse after taking them. Um, that’s not how they’re supposed to work. Then his side starting hurting because he thinks he fucked it up sleeping on the futon so often this week.

Splendid – that’s the same futon upon which I will be sleeping tonight so he can have the bedroom to himself.

Oh, and don’t tell me D has another ear infection. I know that was the diagnosis when she first pulled the bedtime crying stunt back in March, but I find it really hard to believe that it’s back just 2 weeks after the doctor gave us the all-clear.

When I took her in right before we went to Canada the infection was totally gone in both ears. There was just a little bit of fluid left in one of them, but her doctor said that was completely normal.

Sooo… what gives here people? Tonight she even kept lying down like she was going to go to sleep as long as she could still see me each time she picked her head up. What the? Finally she was like f this, I’m just going to get up. And there we went again.

So finally at 9:30, about an hour and a half after I first started trying to put her to bed, I was able to take a shower. And then since I had the house to myself at long last I gave myself a pedicure. Don’t laugh at either my gross feet or my horrible nail painting skills. There’s a reason I don’t do this for a living:

This little piggy

It’s a rad color I picked up at CVS yesterday, and is much more aqua than it looks in that picture. For some reason only the blue hue got picked up, none of the green. I did take it with my iPhone, though. I wanted a change of pace for the urban adventure race I’m doing tomorrow with my trainer and another girl. Not that anyone will be able to see my toes through my running shoes, but still.

And now I’m going to go eat some Kopp’s frozen custard. I cleaned out and up the whole garage today, walked up to the grocery store with R and D, mowed the yard, and played single parent for a while.

Damn, I hope R’s meds kick in soon. I don’t need 2 babies to take care of in this house.

 

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Creepy McCreeperton

Last night R, D, and I went for a walk up to the post office to pick up all our mail from last week and then to the neighborhood grocery store. It was hot as blazes, but we’re tough like that (or maybe a little crazy). And we ended up having 2 packages waiting at the post office too, so those were fun to cart around on the stroller. Anyhoo.

I was standing in front of D in her stroller in the produce area of the grocery store as R was picking out some veggies, when a man walked by with his cart and stopped to smile and wave at D. No big deal there, everyone does that. So I did my usual, “Can you say hi?” to her, while she just sat there smiling at the guy. Now here’s the weird part. His comment was, “So cute. That’s not fair of you bringing him in here. It’s gonna make every woman’s who walks by ovaries ache.” Um, ew?

First off, she’s a “her”, not a “him”. She had on a little blue dress with flowers across the neckline and matching bloomers. Whatevs, small detail there. But the ovaries comment? Ick. Sure he was just being friendly, but that kinda skeeved me out. I know I’ve said on here how my ovaries have kind of started itching to do the baby thing again, but that’s totally different. That’s me talking about myself, not some random male stranger making on off-hand comment about ovaries to a woman with her baby.

I asked R if he heard what that guy said on our way home, then relayed the conversation and how it grossed me out, and he goes, “What? I don’t even know what that means,” and started laughing. Silly boys.

What do you think? Was that a weird comment, or am I just the weird one?

** Side note, but still baby-related, I found out yesterday another good friend of mine is pregnant. Congrats, C!!! And 3 friends had baby girls last week while I was gone – congratulations, C with baby S, L with baby C, and F with baby B! This really is baby madness. **

 

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Mean girl

How do I prevent D from becoming one?

There is nothing I hate more than girls of any age, really, whose main goal in life is to form cliques, be the top dog of those cliques, and subsequently make life a living hell for anyone not in with them.

You know exactly who I mean. We all experienced them in school or even outside of school in life at some point, I’m sure. I know I did. And I was never the top dog. Nor was I ever really in, either. And when I think back and am perfectly honest, it sucked.

I don’t think I was ever the direct target of any cliques’ disdain or fun-making, but I was never really invited into a lot of stuff either. I don’t mean invited to join in torturing other non-clique members (even though i wasn’t), but just in general.

Sure I had a good group of friends all through school, but I was never one of the *cool* kids or the popular girl that everyone wanted to befriend. And up until pretty much my senior year in high school, I was really, really shy.

Me, initiate a plan with friends or an idea for something to do with others? Not a chance.

Hence, I spent most weekend nights just hanging out at home rather than out at parties like a lot of people in my class. (in my defense, though, i actually did like spending time with my family. maybe it was because i felt most safe and comfortable there, or maybe it was because my group of friends just weren’t the big partiers, but i didn’t mind staying home on those weekend nights one bit.)

Throughout grade school, and pretty much all of high school, too, I always felt like I didn’t quite fit in with everyone else. I’ve never been able to figure out why that was, either.

Maybe because I had such a weird last name that no one could pronounce (Picl – take your best shot, but i’m sure you’ll get it wrong. teachers taking attendance became the bane of my existence).

Or maybe because I was always one of the “smart” kids.

I think my shyness definitely played a big part, too. In a group of people or unfamiliar situation I would never go talk to someone I didn’t know or who I thought I wasn’t “friends” with, I would just stand by myself if my friends weren’t around and try to blend into the walls or background.

Finally by the end of my junior year and into my senior year of high school, I was much more confident in myself and stopped being so hung up on everyone else’s perceptions. So what if they didn’t like me? Not everyone has to. I liked me. And so what if I didn’t know someone that well? I could still say hi to them in the halls instead of averting my eyes and pretending I didn’t see them.

I made a lot more friends in my class (well, ok, acquaintances anyway) and actually had some fun. I was valedictorian of my high school class and athlete of the year, which was an unbelievably huge honor for me, since I never considered myself an athlete either. I was just a swimmer. But senior year I single-handedly outscored our entire football team at the State level. Now there’s a confidence-booster if there ever was one.

I was still beyond ready to get out of both high school and Peoria by the end, though, but at least the days became a little more bearable. “Glory days” high school definitely was not, for me.

But enough of my therapy session. Back to the matter at hand, which is making sure D doesn’t turn into one of those clique-forming, classmate-heckling mean girls.

Unfortunately I did tease kids in my classes from time to time when I was younger, like in grade school. And I am sorry for that. Why is it that everyone always picks on the fat kid? But I was also teased sometimes, and I didn’t like it. It hurt my feelings. Too bad I never turned that around in my head to see that’s how the kids I teased felt, too.

I guess it just worries me now more than ever, as a parent, how judgmental kids can be of those who are different from them. And why do so many parents not instill the value of acceptance and tolerance in their children?

My parents never really said much about it not being right to make fun of people (even though i didn’t really make it a habit. remember the wallflower? she usually came out to play more often than any sort of teaser), but that is one of the main things I am determined to teach D – don’t be mean to someone just because they don’t look or act just like you do.

I want her to learn that everyone has a story, everyone has feelings that can get hurt just like hers, and just because you think someone is “different” doesn’t mean they don’t get a chance too. I don’t want her to be a pushover, by any means, but I just want her to know how to treat others with respect. All the bullying stories that are out there now make my stomach turn, and it’s something of which I never want D to be a part.

I guess on the flip side, how do I teach her to handle a situation if she is on the unfortunate receiving end of teasing?

That one’s harder, and I’m really not sure.

Of course my wish is that she becomes a nice, funny, friendly girl who no one wants to make fun of, but I would hope that if she is she would be confident enough not to let it bother her too much. Or, something that I would never have dreamed of doing when I was little, be able to tell the person who’s teasing her that she doesn’t appreciate it and to knock it off.

Obviously confidence isn’t something she’ll really know for years, but I think you know what I’m saying. I just want to be a good enough mom to raise a strong, self-confident daughter, not a mean girl.

I just found this paragraph from a woman’s tribute to her father, and although it came from a completely different scenario than that of which I’m speaking here, this is exactly what I want to teach D:

“My dad taught me so many, many things, and the most important of them were things he taught me by example.  He taught me to be considerate, to give people the benefit of the doubt, to not be judgmental, and to be patient.  He taught me that honesty is best, even when it’s the more difficult choice, and he taught me to treat everyone with respect.”

 

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11 month stats

D turns 11 months old tomorrow, so let’s see what’s new since last month, shall we?

Not a whole lot. 🙂

Stats

  • We don’t go for official measurements again until August at her 1 year appointment, but since she’s been in so often recently for these damn ear infections I know she weighs about 19.5 lbs.
  • Discovered she’s allergic to the Omnicef family of antibiotics. Sweet. That was fun.

Likes/Dislikes/Miscellany

  • Feeds herself a lot more, which is encouraging. Daycare said they haven’t actually fed her for months, besides stuff that obviously needs a spoon, like yogurt. She much preferred to have me feed her at home, though, but has recently become more willing to pick stuff up herself to eat. She does like to grab for the spoon now too, which I know I need to let her do, but I rarely like to since whatever she grabs for ends up on the floor, her head, or me.
  • To go along with the self-feeding, she’s started eating a wider variety of foods, too. Doesn’t favor just baby cereal anymore, which I think is awesome. Since we’ve already switched her to cow’s milk, I’ve started giving her whole milk yogurt too, instead of the specific baby yogurt (which i think is just whole milk yogurt, anyway). This is great, since I can stir a dropper-full of those nasty iron-fortified vitamins that she needs to take into the yogurt, and she’ll still eat it. Victory! (watch, now that i say that she’ll stop eating it. pray for us all) She doesn’t mind meat now either, probably because we just give her tiny bites of our regular stuff, not pureed and mashed up. Brats and sausage are ones of which she’s particularly fond. Blueberries are her new-found favorite, and those and Cheerios I think she would eat by the bushel-full if we let her.
  • Loves to cruise around the house and does so with ease. She still does the hands and knees galloping that she transitioned to from the frog-legged scooting. Before this funny little maneuver she would scoot with one leg forward and one leg back, and when she finally got onto her hands and knees we were like oh nice, she’s gonna crawl! Nope, she’s still scooting. Leap-frogging, actually. She literally bounds along on her hands and knees, very much like a little pony galloping. Especially when she sees you and gets really excited – man, she moves! She’s already burned some holes in the knee of one of her pairs of pants. I thought only little boys did that.
  • Now stands without assistance for a couple seconds quite frequently. She still needs something on which to pull herself up to standing (the coffee table, couch, dresser, toilet, your leg), but she can let go and just hang there by herself. Last weekend I had taken her to see some of our friends, and she was trying to get some Cheerios out of the cap to her bottle while standing there like nobody’s business. Like yeah, Mom, I’m standing here, no big deal, nothing to see. I haven’t gotten her to take a step while standing yet to begin the actual walking phase, though. She still plops back down to the ground to start moving. I have a feeling, however, that first step will occur any time now.
  • Still loves playing with all her toys, and now especially likes her gumball machine. She knows how to open the door at the bottom to take a ball out, then drop it back in the top so it can go down the slide. Don’t worry, they’re not actual gumballs, they’re toy balls, not chokeable.
  • She loves riding in the cart at the grocery store. She still is pretty tiny for it, so I make sure to strap her in each time, but she has the best time going up and down the aisles laughing and squealing.
  • Loves to whip her daily sheet from daycare around when you pick her up like a flag, often hitting you in the face with a paper cut. I have learned to now fold it in quarters before handing it to her to avoid getting sliced. For whatever reason, carrying around pieces of paper is one of her favorite activities – her daycare sheet, grocery lists, receipts, etc.
  • Still doesn’t appreciate being put onto her changing table for diaper changes, so I’ve found a tactic that makes her laugh – I reach into the basket of diapers that’s just behind and above her head, grab one of her shoes, and quickly put it on top of my head while making a ridiculous noise and smiley face. This turns tears into instant giggles. Why, who knows? She’s a baby, that’s why.
  • Still loves all her lift-the-flap books, and will look up at you and smile as you’re reading to her. I love that.
  • I thought she’d outgrown her jumperoo, but I put her in it the other day while doing a workout dvd, and she still goes nuts.
  • Can still wear 9 month sized clothes for the most part, but is slowly moving to all 12 month stuff. The 9 month pants are getting pretty capri-ish on her, plus all the summer clothes I’ve bought are 12+ months anyway. Unfortunately the weather has been such shit up until now that she hasn’t even had a chance to break out these cute new outfits yet and has still been wearing her long sleeves and pants.
  • Is in size 3 diapers. What, you didn’t want to know that one?
  • Still has just 6 teeth, 4 top front ones and 2 bottom front ones. I kept thinking some new ones would break through these past couple weeks since she was so uncomfortable, but I think all of that was just from the ear infections and subsequent rash. Boo.
  • Dropped her afternoon nap at daycare a while ago for some reason (not sure if i mentioned that last month or not). She’ll usually take about an hourish nap at some point mid-late morning, but refuses to nap in the afternoon. I guess there’s just too much fun stuff happening there that she doesn’t want to miss, because she almost always takes 2 naps when she’s home on the weekends. As a result, she’s often wiped out tired by the time we get home from daycare each day, but I try not to let her nap so she’ll go to bed earlier and usually sleep pretty well through the night. With no second nap she’ll go to bed as early as 6-7; with a second nap she might be up until 9 or sometimes later, depending on how wound up she is.

And for your viewing pleasure, recent photos of the wondrous and amazing Miss D.

 

Yep, 2 bottles, that's how I roll

 

 

Come here, Mom, gimme that camera

 

 

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Relief

Ahh, D slept last night. Thank the lord and all things holy – finally! With all the pleading and praying I did for her to sleep these past couple days, I should probably start going to church.

It seems like she is finally on the right medicine, so hopefully her ears will clear up soon as well. The itching stopped (although no thanks to the Benadryl. little did i know excitability in children is also a side effect. so it either knocks them out or winds them up, and D was spinning like a top. wish i’d known that before i kept pumping it in her to make her stop scratching), the rash is gone, the fever is down, and the sweet sweet sleep came back. I did stay home with her yesterday after the sleepless weekend and since her rash wasn’t completely gone at that point (it’s not contagious or anything, but i knew she was very low on sleep and eating so didn’t want to throw her back into daycare quite yet), and she still didn’t nap well – maybe an hour or so total all day. But other than that we actually had a great day together – no more Fs. The day went so well, in fact, that I even walked D up to the grocery store, made dinner, and had it all ready by the time R got home. That NEVER happens.

It was still a bit of a struggle to get her to go to bed last night, though, so I was afraid we were going to have another round of nighttime war. But maybe she just really did want to keep playing until 9pm – had to get that last round of walking around the coffee table in and rolling that last ball under the couch, apparently. She did wake up once, about 2 hours after I put her to bed, but fortunately went right back to sleep after just a few minutes of rocking. And I heard her cry out once more later on in the middle of the night and again thought we were done for, but magically she put herself right back to sleep with no waking. I put some blankets under one end of her mattress on Sunday night, since I’ve heard that the incline helps their ears hurt less when there’s an infection in there, but who knows if that’s doing any good or not. Sunday night it was pointless, then last night she did ok. I have a feeling it’s more the medicine finally taking hold instead of the incline, but I may leave it like that for another night or two just to make sure. This new antibiotic is only a 5 day duration, so tomorrow is the last dose anyway. I just can’t even express how relieved I am that her little body finally cooperated with her and gave her the rest she so desperately needed.

R went to bed really early last night because he was exhausted too and never sleeps well even on a good night, and even he got a full, sound night’s sleep for the first time in, oh, I don’t know, ever? So you see – it’s amazing the power of those dark hours they call sleep. Not to scare all of you soon-to-be new or thinking-about-being-soon-to-be new parents out there or anything, but GET THEM IN WHILE YOU STILL CAN!